All the many pastors in my now way past midlife life have let me down at one time or another in something done or not done, just like I've let each of them down the same way. Jesus Christ has never let me down, however. If only we could see Him in each other more, the let downs would become fewer and fewer, I'm sure.
What a beautiful way to think of pastoring like Jesus - seeing peoples real faces and holding up a mirror for them to see, also. That’s where the good and hard work is.
To be honest, the sports car thing has its merits. As I was processing that thing that shook me, I had to wrestle with a few things all at the same time. The illusion that I was in control of that stuff in my "sphere of authority"; the realization that spiritualized hustle culture and its close kin, legalism, are just excuses to keep me from what matters most; the struggle of what it means to be "flourishing" in the eyes of God at the same time society and church think I'm irrelevant.
My deepest relationships are those with online friends who have suffered much and reached out to each other. I long for friendships with fellow Christians who are physically present, but my circumstances (being a full time caregiver) prevent me from reaching out or attending bible studies, etc. I am lonely. God has given me friends who are not believers, and that is a blessing, but there is no sharing of the deep things we would share if we were all believers. I remind myself that there are seasons, and this season is a wintery one. I love your writing, Aimee. Thanks.
I have a good friend who pastors a church. I told him I could never be a member of his church because we would cease to be friends. He asked why, so I told him, now every thing in our discussions is on the table, but if I joined he would have to weather complaints from his congregation and instead of a friend he would ask I stop talking about things that disturb them. At first he was taken aback, but he saw what I was saying. It is a shame, isn't.
While I was pastoring, there was a family that we considered fairly good friends, but decided at some point - in their words - they could never be friends with their pastor (although they became quite close with their next pastor). While I affirm everything Aimee wrote in the OP, it is also true that congregants should aim to be true friends for their pastor as well.
On another note, I am just starting to write on Substack, would appreciate anyone reading about “Why my kids didn’t do anything for me on Mother’s Day.”
Friends are so hard to find. I have had friends who were just friends with me because we were in ministry together. After the church broke up, and we decided to leave, they don’t even talk to me any more. We have nothing in common. They didn’t really know and care for me as a person.
Jesus stayed in the room. That’s the kind of friend I want to be.
All the many pastors in my now way past midlife life have let me down at one time or another in something done or not done, just like I've let each of them down the same way. Jesus Christ has never let me down, however. If only we could see Him in each other more, the let downs would become fewer and fewer, I'm sure.
Pastors are meant to be friends, indeed. 💙
Beautiful as always, maybe that "pastor" told them you liked bourbon :)
What a beautiful way to think of pastoring like Jesus - seeing peoples real faces and holding up a mirror for them to see, also. That’s where the good and hard work is.
To be honest, the sports car thing has its merits. As I was processing that thing that shook me, I had to wrestle with a few things all at the same time. The illusion that I was in control of that stuff in my "sphere of authority"; the realization that spiritualized hustle culture and its close kin, legalism, are just excuses to keep me from what matters most; the struggle of what it means to be "flourishing" in the eyes of God at the same time society and church think I'm irrelevant.
Okay, I will give you a nod on the sports car merits, Mark ;)
Let’s not be afraid to stay in the room without hiding in the corner …
Excellent.
My deepest relationships are those with online friends who have suffered much and reached out to each other. I long for friendships with fellow Christians who are physically present, but my circumstances (being a full time caregiver) prevent me from reaching out or attending bible studies, etc. I am lonely. God has given me friends who are not believers, and that is a blessing, but there is no sharing of the deep things we would share if we were all believers. I remind myself that there are seasons, and this season is a wintery one. I love your writing, Aimee. Thanks.
Those wintry seasons are so difficult.
I have a good friend who pastors a church. I told him I could never be a member of his church because we would cease to be friends. He asked why, so I told him, now every thing in our discussions is on the table, but if I joined he would have to weather complaints from his congregation and instead of a friend he would ask I stop talking about things that disturb them. At first he was taken aback, but he saw what I was saying. It is a shame, isn't.
While I was pastoring, there was a family that we considered fairly good friends, but decided at some point - in their words - they could never be friends with their pastor (although they became quite close with their next pastor). While I affirm everything Aimee wrote in the OP, it is also true that congregants should aim to be true friends for their pastor as well.
Yes, it goes both ways.
On another note, I am just starting to write on Substack, would appreciate anyone reading about “Why my kids didn’t do anything for me on Mother’s Day.”
Joyful Lamb
Friends are so hard to find. I have had friends who were just friends with me because we were in ministry together. After the church broke up, and we decided to leave, they don’t even talk to me any more. We have nothing in common. They didn’t really know and care for me as a person.
Great writing Aimee.