So much. When I was 20-something, I knew and followed all the rules in the NAPARC rulebook, so I was definitely good. I didn't really feel a need for a spiritual or emotional connection, just check all the boxes. Now that I see God as a person who wants to be in relationship, I struggle even where to begin.
I borrowed a copy of your Recovering... book. Seems like you're in a similar place as I am now with the view of church leadership. I have found more and more truth in Van Vonderen/Johnson's claim that authority is more a Spirit-filled and Spirit-led journey than a MDiv degree and a couple of examinations. The people I want to speak to me about God aren't the intelligent and theologically astute fresh batch of seminary grads straight from college. They're the people who have walked with Jesus through a lifetime of joys and pains and whose words, whether polished or broken English, are filled with Spiritual truth. I agree that the church needs authority, but it might not be the guy behind the pulpit whose teaching we need.
This was really timely and helpful to hear today: https://youtu.be/dwyVliDJOw8?t=4100 - the whole sermon is worth a listen, but starting here through at least 1:20 was a good reminder of the work of the Spirit.
Thanks so much Aimee for continuing your honesty as a disciple. Looks like growth to me. You leave feathers and humming bird visits for us with your honest sharing.
Oh, my soul felt all these words as though they were mine—and on some level, I know they are. The Lord has given you the ability to intercede for others through words, even as you ask him to intercede for you. I am so thankful for the way he has made you to image him in your unique way as Aimee. Praying with you as I read your thoughts today.
Thank you Aimee. Indeed you are not alone. And indeed He is “there”… but sometimes that “there” can be nowhere familiar for a long long time. It can be wilderness. It can be deep valleys. It can be unending oceans with no horizon in view. And the pain…the pain is so real. And it distorts our “glasses” to see Him… the pain wounds and creates numb places in our hearts- making us almost unable to sense His presence, His gentle whisper. Almost… Thank you for sharing the both-and. The yes God is there and God are you there? He welcomes us to hold the both and. Hugs to you from a fellow “wounded and seeking and being sought” daughter
I’ve been sifting through dross so long sometimes I feel like a worn out sieve. Thank you for your vulnerability - it’s comforting to know I’m not alone! I’ve never doubted God was there, but I’m rediscovering who he really is. I also had a close, let’s just chat about anything relationship with him as a preteen and I too miss that. But I’m more clear these days about how much he loves me, that he doesn’t think I need punishment and I’m never going to be “left behind” 🥰
What a beautifully written and heartwarming piece, Aimee! Your words remind us of the importance of opening ourselves up to receive help and comfort. Thank you for sharing.
“Don’t you think it’s time for me to start growing, God?
If you could arrange it, I’d be very glad.
Thank you.” As an old aged guy (75) following Christ for the last 51 years I’ve been feeling dried up and stuck in the mud, kind of useless being retired after 40 years of pastoral ministry. Help me to grow again Lord, to experience the fresh taste of your grace and mercy flowing through me again and overflowing with Gratitude. Thank you once again Aimee for touching my heart with your eloquent thoughts.
So much. When I was 20-something, I knew and followed all the rules in the NAPARC rulebook, so I was definitely good. I didn't really feel a need for a spiritual or emotional connection, just check all the boxes. Now that I see God as a person who wants to be in relationship, I struggle even where to begin.
I borrowed a copy of your Recovering... book. Seems like you're in a similar place as I am now with the view of church leadership. I have found more and more truth in Van Vonderen/Johnson's claim that authority is more a Spirit-filled and Spirit-led journey than a MDiv degree and a couple of examinations. The people I want to speak to me about God aren't the intelligent and theologically astute fresh batch of seminary grads straight from college. They're the people who have walked with Jesus through a lifetime of joys and pains and whose words, whether polished or broken English, are filled with Spiritual truth. I agree that the church needs authority, but it might not be the guy behind the pulpit whose teaching we need.
And I wonder, what does the priesthood of all believers even mean anymore?
This was really timely and helpful to hear today: https://youtu.be/dwyVliDJOw8?t=4100 - the whole sermon is worth a listen, but starting here through at least 1:20 was a good reminder of the work of the Spirit.
Thanks so much Aimee for continuing your honesty as a disciple. Looks like growth to me. You leave feathers and humming bird visits for us with your honest sharing.
Oh, my soul felt all these words as though they were mine—and on some level, I know they are. The Lord has given you the ability to intercede for others through words, even as you ask him to intercede for you. I am so thankful for the way he has made you to image him in your unique way as Aimee. Praying with you as I read your thoughts today.
Thank you for sharing that, I love to hear how others resonate with my own thoughts and world. We are not alone!
Thank you Aimee. Indeed you are not alone. And indeed He is “there”… but sometimes that “there” can be nowhere familiar for a long long time. It can be wilderness. It can be deep valleys. It can be unending oceans with no horizon in view. And the pain…the pain is so real. And it distorts our “glasses” to see Him… the pain wounds and creates numb places in our hearts- making us almost unable to sense His presence, His gentle whisper. Almost… Thank you for sharing the both-and. The yes God is there and God are you there? He welcomes us to hold the both and. Hugs to you from a fellow “wounded and seeking and being sought” daughter
All of this 👆🏽
So well put Sarah Joy.
I’ve been sifting through dross so long sometimes I feel like a worn out sieve. Thank you for your vulnerability - it’s comforting to know I’m not alone! I’ve never doubted God was there, but I’m rediscovering who he really is. I also had a close, let’s just chat about anything relationship with him as a preteen and I too miss that. But I’m more clear these days about how much he loves me, that he doesn’t think I need punishment and I’m never going to be “left behind” 🥰
What a beautifully written and heartwarming piece, Aimee! Your words remind us of the importance of opening ourselves up to receive help and comfort. Thank you for sharing.
“Don’t you think it’s time for me to start growing, God?
If you could arrange it, I’d be very glad.
Thank you.” As an old aged guy (75) following Christ for the last 51 years I’ve been feeling dried up and stuck in the mud, kind of useless being retired after 40 years of pastoral ministry. Help me to grow again Lord, to experience the fresh taste of your grace and mercy flowing through me again and overflowing with Gratitude. Thank you once again Aimee for touching my heart with your eloquent thoughts.
I love that we never stop needing to grow.
This resonates with me in so many ways. Thank you so much, Aimee!
Beautiful. Thank you, Aimee.